There are five strengths that appear in several of the lojong slogans: strong determination, familiarization, seed of virtue, reproach and aspiration. They show up on both ends of our spectrum on Earth: the living of daily challenges AND the ejection of our consciousness at death. Seeing as these five are seminal to our existence on this plane, it would seem wise to explore each of them, fully. So, as I enter into the second "storm of the decade" (already a foot of snow and still falling fast), I thought I might ponder the first strength: strong determination.
Pema Chodron, our good Buddhist friend and teacher, reminds us that these are "heart instructions on how to live and die". She also reminds us that "there's no difference". She goes on to write that, if you "know how to live then you'll know how to die..." (Chodron, START WHERE YOU ARE, 1994)
For me, strong determination means not shrinking from nor withdrawing from new challenges that are scary. Learning that I've usually just "pushed through" (often with bitching and grinding of teeth) situations that terrify me. I've "had to prove myself"--to others (or to myself)-- so often, that it becomes a kind of personal style. The result is this façade : Minns is so tough! The actuality is that I'm exhausted and sad a lot of the time. Exhausted, because it takes so much energy trying to be "the strong one" or "the good one" and sad, because I feel nobody has taken the time to see behind the mask--or cares to know the "authentic me". (Do I blame them? No. The "authentic me" is full of doubt, fear, insecurity and confusion. Which way to go, now? What will the next five years bring? Can I pull this off? Have I passed the age of accomplishment? Will I always be alone? What does that MEAN?????) Of course, hot on the heels of these serious inquiries, is the nagging worry of being
self-centered. The truest parts of me seem to be worried and selfish most of the time. (Sigh.)
The lojong slogan of strong determination seems to offer a way out of this hailstorm. To relax and realize that the light in this tunnel involves developing a strong spiritual appetite. (Hey! I recognize that! Good news, finally: I've always possessed that ! Maybe I'm not a lost cause after all !) Next, instead of powering through situations that are scary, I need to breathe. Try to chill out and just meet them, with joy. Meet them as new friends on the path of my life. Relax and trust that these are simply challenges.
If I soften my heart and don't rush past, trusting and open-- this IS exactly what I need-- I don't have to be afraid. I can let go of whatever outcome I may have hoped I could force. Whatever happens is precisely what is necessary. My "take" on the situation can be dropped. I no longer have to wear "the mask of toughness". The story-line of the situation isn't what is important (or real). The free space of possibility swings wide. Terror, unabating worry, suffering lessens.
Suddenly,there is room for Enlightenment.
Pema Chodron, our good Buddhist friend and teacher, reminds us that these are "heart instructions on how to live and die". She also reminds us that "there's no difference". She goes on to write that, if you "know how to live then you'll know how to die..." (Chodron, START WHERE YOU ARE, 1994)
For me, strong determination means not shrinking from nor withdrawing from new challenges that are scary. Learning that I've usually just "pushed through" (often with bitching and grinding of teeth) situations that terrify me. I've "had to prove myself"--to others (or to myself)-- so often, that it becomes a kind of personal style. The result is this façade : Minns is so tough! The actuality is that I'm exhausted and sad a lot of the time. Exhausted, because it takes so much energy trying to be "the strong one" or "the good one" and sad, because I feel nobody has taken the time to see behind the mask--or cares to know the "authentic me". (Do I blame them? No. The "authentic me" is full of doubt, fear, insecurity and confusion. Which way to go, now? What will the next five years bring? Can I pull this off? Have I passed the age of accomplishment? Will I always be alone? What does that MEAN?????) Of course, hot on the heels of these serious inquiries, is the nagging worry of being
self-centered. The truest parts of me seem to be worried and selfish most of the time. (Sigh.)
The lojong slogan of strong determination seems to offer a way out of this hailstorm. To relax and realize that the light in this tunnel involves developing a strong spiritual appetite. (Hey! I recognize that! Good news, finally: I've always possessed that ! Maybe I'm not a lost cause after all !) Next, instead of powering through situations that are scary, I need to breathe. Try to chill out and just meet them, with joy. Meet them as new friends on the path of my life. Relax and trust that these are simply challenges.
If I soften my heart and don't rush past, trusting and open-- this IS exactly what I need-- I don't have to be afraid. I can let go of whatever outcome I may have hoped I could force. Whatever happens is precisely what is necessary. My "take" on the situation can be dropped. I no longer have to wear "the mask of toughness". The story-line of the situation isn't what is important (or real). The free space of possibility swings wide. Terror, unabating worry, suffering lessens.
Suddenly,there is room for Enlightenment.
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